Expert: How to Discipline Your Children
Jennifer Poole, the executive director of Medical Services Pacific (MSP) said the purpose of discipline was to teach children the appropriate behaviour so they may get along with others and live effectively in the world.
Her comments come after an 11-year-old boy allegedly took his own life last Saturday after an argument broke out with his mother.
Ms Poole said: “It involves guiding children to make wise decisions about their conduct and gradually allowing them to accept the responsibility for their choices.
“There are various ways parents can enforce discipline through rewards and non-physical punishment such as using time-outs, or a combination of rewards and restricting privileges such as television or video games, which are effective methods of initiating parental controls to re-direct a child.
“Physical punishment in the name of discipline is a negative tool.
“Parents should strive to discipline their children using positive tools.”
Ms Poole said rewards should be used where a child is acknowledged for good behaviour and punishment for inappropriate behaviour is done by removal of privileges like hanging out with friends or even having to do extra household chores.
“Sometimes children act out as they are expressing something that they are unable to talk about or explain,” Ms Poole said.
“It could represent situations at school, among peers or even sexual abuse.”
KNOW THE SIGNS
There are many issues that can push a child towards depression or anxiety and Ms Poole said it was important to identify the root cause of child’s behaviour or attitude change.
She said situations in schools (e.g. bullying), child sexual abuse, and experiences of traumatic incidents or being a victim of domestic violence are some factors.
“Therefore, the first step at individual level is to take anyone seriously if they speak of committing suicide or make such suggestions.
“It is important to look out of indicators of depression, anxiety, self-harm and substance abuse.”
Ms Poole added MSP believed that awareness, education and empowerment was the key to address the health concern.
“Nationally, services are provided by various agencies, who work collaboratively as part of the National Inter-Agency Guideline on Child Abuse and Neglect.”
Ms Poole urged parents to recognise the signs of depression, withdrawal or anxiety or anxious.
She said report children at risk or others in need to the Child Helpline or key service providers such as the Ministry of Women Children and Poverty Alleviation, Department of Child Services, or the Fiji Police Force.
“It is important for parents to safeguard their children form any form of abuse and neglect and at the same time pay attention to signs/indicators of such incidences or their child being distressed,” said Ms Poole.
Meanwhile two other cases of alleged suicide involving students were reported.
In Ovalau, a Year 11 student of St John’s College in Cawaci, allegedly committed suicide in the dormitory on August 28.
On September 2, a 14-year-old claimed that two unknown men had allegedly set her alight. The victim suffered 90 percent burns, she later died on Monday. Following post-mortem examinations, it was determined that it was a suicide case. Police ruled out foul play.
If you see a child suffering from depression or at risk, call the National Child Helpline on 1325 or visit the Medical Services Pacific located at 355 Waimanu Road, Suva or Lot 11, Naiyaca Sub-division in Labasa.
Edited by Ranoba Baoa
Feedback: sheenam.chandra@fijisun.com.fj
